Personal Growth? Say "Yes!"

Why I do what I do.

There are times it appears I'm into everything.   I'm involved to the point where I simply can't say, "No" and I'll decide to do things only because no one else jumped ahead of me and said, "Yes". 

This, however, can be a very good thing.

With each new challenge we are confronted with or choose to take on, we grow as individuals.  We can always do more and achieve more.  "Yes" always leads to personal growth.  "Yes" is positive. "Yes" pushes us forward. 

"Yes" is empowering, it motivates us to do more."

 I know many people who say, "Yes!" with confidence and they are ready to take on any and all challenges life throws at them.  They have no fear, only an optimism for success.

Those who say, "No" have excuses, judgments and find cause to disagree.  They wait for life to change for them, when all the power is within to say, "Yes!" to something new, to say 'Yes!' and foster change for growth. 

People often ask me, "How do I do, all that I do?" And I NEVER think it's too much.  I never think, "I can't".  I just do. I am often amazed at what manifests right before my eyes.  (My husband is very much the same, our marriage has become a force filled with hope, dreams and lots of change) 

Sometimes, I have absolutely no solid plan, only an idea or good intentions and step by step it all comes together.  The right people present themselves, at just the right time.  The opportunities find me. 

After an event or activity, I scan my brain to think who do I need to thank? Who came together to make this happen?  I become acutely aware of how I can make the event better and do more to find wholeness in the process.  It is all instantaneous. 

If it's simply a fun day or night out, I am simply grateful for my family or friends.  There is a special dynamic when we come together and I love this energy and the goodness it holds.  

All I do is say, "Yes" and Go!  It's empowering to watch how lives are impacted and memories are made.  

There are times I feel as If I'm not doing anything, I simply let spirit work through me.  Those who want to share the experience, trust me and laugh by my side.  Others watch on, but soon may find themselves pulled onto the journey.  It is serindepdity meshed with joy, sprinkled with love for a new experience.

On the flip side, I also, always say, "Yes" to downtime, I say "Yes" to my chill out, binge TV time, I say,"Yes" to family time and "girlfriend" time and all the goodness that makes me feel happy and content.  "Yes" to weekends away and vacations and anything that I'll regret not doing one day.

What if we all simply said, "Yes!"  Imagine the things we would achieve?

Breaking out of the Bubble

I thrive on bringing people together.  I much rather see people gather on common ground, in a happy space, than at odds over something trivial.  Finding the good and learning to trust others is much more productive than picking people apart for the sake of our egos.

We all have done this.  We all know how it feels when it's done to us.  It hurts and people can be cruel about the most mundane things.  But why do we still do it?

Where is our trust, our loyalty, our love and forgiveness?  When can we give without expecting anything in return?  Where is the graciousness of thanking those who support us?

We all yearn for understanding, forgiveness and basic kindness, however it is all of these things we tend to forget to give to those we interact with. Especially to those we don't know or don't know well. 

As a society we are quick to judge others for what they do, without knowing who they are. When we know a person well, we are much more forgiving of their actions and their words.

Our word is our gift to others.  Words of care nurture, they go further than words that lack care; and when that care is not present, it hurts our own souls the most. 

Deep within, we sense this, but we still forget and continue on a loveless (careless) path, and the remedy is as simple as giving with our hearts.

With the right mindset, we all can be warmer, softer, better.  We can leave our harmful words alone and instead think of the goodness that will fill someone else's heart, selflessly.

Living in Suburbia, behind our social media personas, creates a bubble of illusion on what's true and what's only part of someone's story.  

We use social media as a crutch, it gives us permission to forget our human instincts to do onto others as you would want done onto you.  I've experienced and seen good people, my own friends, shredded by comments of others.  

One friend's entire week was ruined over a little dog poop.  I kid you not! 

Our suburban life allows people to hide behind a veil of questions.  We don't know each other well, we keep facades of goodness and play roles in public which are inconsistent with who we are and what we truly feel inside.  

Unintentionally, this throws ourselves into a funk, feeling depleted of what we truly want out of our already busy lives.  We allow our minds to wander to untruths, doubt festers and anger looms when in reality, honest communication resolves those seeds of doubt before they are fertilized. 

I had another friend who thought I was mad at her over something trivial, when in fact, a text I had sent to her, resolving her doubts, never transfered through. 

I nonchalantly commented how I was wondering if I should re-send it and ultimately forgot, meanwhile she was formulating all sorts of untrue thoughts in her head. I've done this before.  It's interesting how we hide our true feelings at the most inopportune times.  

When we give others the benefit of the doubt, it natually is given back to us. 

This happens with so many of us.  Letting go of the bubble we create around our space is ideal for our physiological well-being.  We all take things so personally and at the end of the day we all just want to be accepted for who we are.  Who we truly are, not the facade that we put out in the world.  Breaking out and freeing our minds of the clutter, wakes up our spirit to everything it needs to thrive in life.  

Doubt - Fear - Anger - Sadness - 

should translate to 

Trust - Comfort - Peace - Happiness 

People Obsessed

As often as I try not to stare, or ease drop, or get into other people's business, people tend to fascinate me.  I watch and observe with wonder and imagine what makes them tick.  I intuitively absorb their essences and sincerely try to do so without judgement.   It is a delicate mental see-saw and hard to do, however with practice it gets easier. 

Yes, we all judge other people.  But, when we move from judgement to observation, it's a much more pleasant space to share ones thoughts. 

I have sensed that dreadful judgment of others and it does not feel good.  I'm thinking, "Okay, what did I do or say or whatever?" and then I choose to move on and simply push it away, usually the person does not truly know me or they have their own issues to deal with and the judgment has nothing to do with me.  Many times I have discovered, the person was simply judging themselves.  

Anyone who is close to me, understands, I'm honest, far from perfect and I'll love you for you no matter what.  I figure, if I'm going to be open, I'll get the same respect in return.

Often, it is those closest to us that will make the harshest judgement, maybe because they care, but deep down it's always about something else.  True, unconditional love, holds no judgement.  We can love our friends and family, but their life choices are their own.

One day, I ran into a mom at a function.  She looked very put out, I was thinking..."Bad day? Fight with the hubby or she's got a major problem." (Like a bug up her butt)  Is it me or the circumstances around the event?  I never found out, but for some weird reason I cared.  My husband noticed too, so I know it wasn't my imagination.  Unfortunately, I'm not that close to the mom, but maybe one day I'll know her better....people are interesting.  They fascinate me. 

"A sour puss gets remembered long after all the other smiles have faded" 'LN

My husband and I took the kids camping on Sanibel Island for Easter weekend.  We found ourselves around so many different types of people on our mini camping adventure.

We camped among friendly families and warm retired folk from up North.  We found ourselves at a church Easter egg hunt and made ourselves right at home with the locals.  We people watched at the beach, made up stories and laughed at our similar observations.  We ventured into Captiva among the rich and most likely famous residents.  We even met people who lived a few towns from where I grew up on Long Island.

It was all good and interesting no matter where we were or who we found ourselves chatting with.  The openness my husband and I share with everyone bleeds in our everyday life, creating opportunity and leading us to new things.  It's never harmed or hindered, only enhanced our lives.  My boys seem to be following our lead.  I love that about our nuclear family. 

People are good.  The more goodness you share, the more you'll ultimately receive.  One smile, one "hello," one conversation at a time.